Chess drama

He’s full of shit, he’s not asking questions, he’s gonna accuse and demand, left this and that and everything else as though he’s king of the world when he’s not. He’s a washed up former world champion who’s not that good at chess anymore and he should shut the fuck up. That’s what he should actually do. – Hikaru Nakamura

Toe touch

I’ve been busting my butt in the gym for the past year, trying to improve my flexibility. This evening, I managed to grab my toes whilst one leg was full extended! SUCCESS!

Last time I did this, was probably when I was around age 10.

And yeah, I know a bunch of you can do this without trying, but for some of us, this requires a LOT of work 😉

Advice for life

Excuse me, do you have a dream? I have many dreams. Yeah? Give us an example of one of your dreams. Just to be happy, yeah, and loved, and in peace. How do you achieve that? If people listening want to learn how to do it, what do you think the answer is? Keep your music on low and just chill. Music on? Yeah, and go for a nice walk. You had a good life? No, it’s been a hard life, but you get on with it. What’s been hard about it? Being brought up in care and being sexually abused as a kid. I lost my brother 26 years ago; he committed suicide over it. You learn to live with it every day. Just strive about waking up. That’s a blessing for me. What do you do now? What’s your focus? Well, just trying to survive. Is there anything we can do to help you, anything you need? No, I’m managing. I’ve only just started having counselling. I also have counselling; I think it’s a healthy thing to have. It’s good; it gets things off your chest. It’s such a taboo, isn’t it, saying you have counselling? I think it’s a mistake. I think people have fewer mental health issues if they get someone to talk to. The thing is, some of us are embarrassed to talk about these things. This is why you have the problems. Thank you for being an honest, open, caring human.

Journey to our role in the world

You can’t have an easy life in a great character show. Show me a trust fund kid that inherited a bunch of money, and I’ll show you someone mentally tortured. Having stuff isn’t fun; getting stuff is fun, right? It’s not the pursuit of happiness; it’s the happiness of the pursuit, right? It’s just that thing. And it’s not like, you know, the self-help saying “it’s not the journey, it’s the destination.” It’s not either the journey or the destination; it’s who you become on the journey. And here’s the terrible thing about life: it’s self-assignment. I don’t think you get self-esteem from the six-pack you get at the gym; I think you get self-esteem from being the kind of person that goes to the gym every day. You get better at it. The weight doesn’t get lighter; your back gets stronger. It’s the hero’s journey, and you’re on a journey to do something, to become something. Right? What are you doing here? What’s your role in the world? – Jimmy Carr

ENT disaster

Rewritten by an LLM via a Google review I wrote:

I walked into the clinic with a blocked ear, expecting a simple ear cleaning. The doctor didn’t even greet me. He performed a quick and crude hearing test with a tuning fork, glanced in my ears, declared “alles gut” (everything is good), and dismissed me in less than a minute. I left with a prescription for ear drops and instructions to return in two days if the issue persisted. The receptionist assured me I wouldn’t be charged unless I needed to come back.

Two days later, the ear drops had worsened my condition. Annoyed but hopeful for proper treatment, I returned. Instead of a gentle ear cleaning, the doctor jammed a metal instrument into my ears, causing excruciating pain as he yanked out chunks of something. I nearly walked out but stayed, thinking I don’t really know much about ear treatments and perhaps this was normal. He did the same to my other ear, which was even more painful, and then dismissed me again. A nurse advised me to sit until I felt better, concerned I might pass out. I was told to keep fabric inserts in my ears overnight and return in three days.

Something felt off, so I visited another ENT doctor later that day. My ears felt very poor. When I described the ordeal, the new doctor took a brief look and exclaimed, “HE’S CRAZY!” She explained that he hadn’t removed the earwax but had taken chunks out of my ear canal. She said it was bleeding. She gently removed the wax with a vacuum device that didn’t hurt much at all, and gave me antibiotic drops to prevent infection from the damage caused by the incompetent nut job.

Below is an image of what I think is the blood that the second doctor found in my ear.